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Friday, August 25, 2017

The Secret of a Happy Marriage

Mike and I celebrated our 45th wedding anniversary on August 12th. We shared the day with our children and grandchildren and some honorary children and grandchildren. In the course of that day, two of them asked, “So what’s the secret?”

The first time, the asker was our son Charlie. Mike and I both sort of shrugged.

The second time, the asker was Colleen, who’s been like a daughter to us since she became our daughter’s bosom buddy when they were preschoolers. I looked at Colleen with the same shrug I had used earlier on Charlie.

Then I looked at Colleen’s husband, Des, and it struck me that I had just read the secret . . . and it was something Des had posted on Facebook just a week or so earlier.

I’m going to quote him directly:

“This Florida vacation was so much fun, and good for the family.

With a blended family, our two oldest girls are not always with us. When you combine that with work and other adult responsibilities, it is sometimes hard to get a lot of GOOD quality family time. Getting the opportunity to spend 10 uninterrupted days with my kids and wife was amazing, and reminded me of how much I love them. Hanging out on the beach all day, collecting sea shells, going to new restaurants, fishing, even catching stingrays and jellyfish!

My family is the most important thing to me in this world, and that will never change. So many great memories and experiences were made over this vacation that are irreplaceable. And nothing says family bonding like traveling cross country in a car for 18 hours in a day! It was the first time we were able to do something like this, and it definitely won’t be the last. #ilovemyfamily.”

Thank you, Desmond Lovelace, for reminding me of the secret. . . .

The Secret of a Happy Marriage. . . and Family

To spend time with you is to know you.

To know you is to love you.

To love you is to build the family soul.

Love is spelled T-I-M-E.

And that’s the secret of a happy marriage.

Spend time together.

Spend time together.

Spend time together.

It doesn’t matter what you do.

Just spend time together.

Mike and me and the gang outside of Café Lulu in Milwaukee,
where we had brunch after getting a blessing at Mass

Gail Grenier is the author of Don't Worry Baby, Dog Woman, Calling All Horses, and Dessert First, all available on

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